SOMETIMES I’LL SAY, ‘I MISS YOU.’ Sometimes I’ll ponder, wondering where you are and how long it’d take me to get to you, or what it would take to get to you, or if I could get to you. Sometimes, foolishly, the word ‘love’ crosses my mind and I digress to think of more sensical things. And sometimes, I know the deeper feeling is that being solitary is the only basis of my thoughts for you. I’m just fine. Really, I am.
But today I felt something more sincere. I was walking on sidewalk freshly scattered with leaves, shuffling my feet between the layers of fresh gold and crunchy brown, enjoying what was a beautiful fall afternoon. I’d step, extend my leg back and swiftly kick up, sending the ground’s quiet blanket in every direction.
The thought came without prompt, somewhere in mid-boot. Grandpa.
I counted the time it’d been since I’d seen him, how quickly December is approaching to add another year to the count. His face, his glasses, his smile. The way he parted his hair, or stepped out of his Blazer in front of the house, stopping by with vegetables from the garden and hand-me-down magazines, hello’s and simple words, a pleasant laugh. Four years. Five years. Too long.
Sometimes I’ll say I miss someone. Sometimes I’ll ponder, and wonder where they are, and how long it would take me to get to them, or what it would take to get to them, or if I could get to them. And then the word ‘love’ crosses my mind, and I don’t feel so foolish…
Because I know where you are, and how long it will take to get to you, and what it takes to get to you. And I really, really love you.
And I feel slightly more aware of demarcation between true and false.

wow, that rocked.>i was just stopping by to say thanks for unknowingly showing me how to put a mixtape in my blog!>but instead i’d rather comment on how beautiful this post is.>parts of it gave me goosebumps.>kudos!!>-matt-