NOT SO LONG AGO I was acquainted with a young lady my age who, after all of the years she spent with her nose to the grindstone at everything and anything she did, was accepted to the prestigious West Point military academy.
She was deserving, I’d say; well, anyone who is accepted to such an institution certainly does not get there on looks or street smarts alone. No one knew of her acceptance into the academy, however, until she informed all that she’d declined it.
Not only did she kick the reputable institute to the curb, she did so with class. Less than a year later she revealed that she was engaged to her fellow McDonald’s employee/lover, and that’s not all: there was definitely a baby on the way.
My only question is, who on earth does these things? My mind spins with exasperation at the mere thought of all the USMA-hopefuls tearing up their rejection letters and crying themselves to sleep. If they only knew that she’d had the chance, a chance she threw away…
…but really?! Who gives up their future at a highly acclaimed school, just to chase a deep-fried love that blossomed amidst Big Mac’s and Happy Meals? For bassinets and dirty diapers? For the LOVE OF PETE (figure of speech, not his actual name)?!
I always wondered this, but I now believe that I am starting to understand. Sure, love does crazy things to you, and yes, love is a battlefield (thank you, Pat Benatar); but not only was she in love, she did what she wanted.
She did what she wanted, regardless of the consequences, the criticism, the never-ending ‘how could you’s’. She knew she could get into the academy. She knew she could go far, and rise above, and get what she desired; she proved it, and she walked away.
And today, she doesn’t have a West Point education, no; just a husband, a baby, and some weird 2-year online nursing degree from a community college. Aside from the 14 hours a day she’s bending over backwards and wiping feces off her child’s rear end, I’m sure she’s living the dream.
This story does have a point.
I am here now, away from where I was. Many minutes — many, many minutes of each day, I wonder. I wonder if I would have been wiser to stay home this summer, to “save money” (the default excuse every college student uses for living at home), to be closer to my family, to save.
It all comes down to the bank. In Minot, I would be living each day with a little more in my pocket, but the bottom line would be misery; I would not be happy. I’d be in a boring comfort zone consumed by mornings of over-sleeping in and driving down Broadway through construction. I’d be subconsciously having the life sucked out of me, depleting like water down a drain.
Like water, down a drain.
I am becoming more independent, I am becoming stronger. These minutes that I have spent wondering have become my enemy, and ultimately now, my affirmation. I must be doing something right.
I do not suggest that you turn down a much sought-after invitation to a top military academy to have a tot and marry Ronald McDonald or who have you. Certainly this choice was not the brightest! In the same regards, my choices, too, may not be well-reasoned — I am currently working to live and living to work. Nevertheless, my glass is half-full and the sky’s the limit.
I am doing this, for whatever it takes.
—jc
ps: Happy birthday in the sky, Gramps! You are missed.
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loved this post’s optimism, and the last line. i miss grandpa ed. thats the exact reason i lived in lawrence the last 2 summers. money limits, but if you can get by, forget the cash.